Worth it

Because I see the truth in you
Waking the sun in the darkness of night
Allowing the moon to shine from your light

This heart is stained
With memories of dispair
No hope for love
but it is still worth it

Hands shaking from this news
I don't know where I am or who I am
Towering clouds suffocating me
This place has kept me from you

This is not right
But I know you are there
Fighting with a sword and a scar
Breaking down the only hope I have left

This heart is stained
With memories of dispair
No hope for love
but it is still worth it

Bakers Dozen

As I say goodbye to this friendship
The never ending story of how caring
Loses to lovely lust
Forgetting what was true
Blowing in the breeze with everything new
Fortitude and Solitude bring truth

This situation I must flee
This situation I must flee
This situation I must flee

So many times this has happened to me
For the world it seems free
But the cost to my heart has no price
That the hole left in me is invisible
I know you can see

This situation I must flee
This situation I must flee
This situation I must flee

For all to remember

FOR ALL TO REMEMBER
There is nothing like you
For the reasons I try it is inspired by you
Time will bring only notes that resemble this feeling

Wandering out in the cold
Warmth of a fire
Thinking enough to overwhelm myself
Too much to tell and talk about
And I only want to tell you 

Bring to me that caring heart
The one that sparks a star
A shooting star forever unfaded
This I will not forget

Wandering out in the cold
Warmth of a fire
Thinking enough to overwhelm myself
Too much to tell and talk about
And I only want to tell you

From hope to despair
No more memories to wander in
Forgetting the past with you
Past is over and now are you

Wandering out in the cold
Warmth of a fire
Thinking enough to overwhelm myself
Too much to tell and talk about
And I only want to tell myself

chronicles

for some strange reason it is so hard for me to let go
to think that something doesn't go my way.
i know everything can't but when it is about my heart/feelings i want perfection

i want to be totally completely happy and content.
with you. (with her) and nothing can go wrong right?

i am very optimistic in life, and people around me know this.
they also know that i rarely ever commit to a girl because i am scared
scared of being hurt, of hurting someone, of caring too much, of not treating her right.
did i do something wrong? was i not good enough? am i ugly or not attractive to her?
these are questions that will never go away. i want answers... before you leave me for good.
if only i could do more for her.

forever in a moment

she was special to me. still is.
no matter what becomes of this.

i miss the times of feeling wanted
knowing she would be there
forgetting the world in those moments

forever I thought that it was not worth it
to care like this and to risk the pain and hurt.
it was worth it even if it was short lived.

I hope she knows that she is special to me.
that I care. and believe in her.
she is beautiful.

benefits & doubts

when thinking about life in a time like this I always wonder why I seem to give people the benefit of the doubt. no matter what it is I always lean in the direction that the other person has a good heart.

it is just who I am I guess.

I know that things happen for a reason, and that people grow apart very easily in today's world. But I just always think positively that things will work out if I put my heart into it and show my love and strength.

today has me wondering about what is wrong. with me.